For the Wife whose husband has "DONE" everything & everyone:
Okay, okay, that was a fake book. I was being silly and milking the Tiger Woods story as much as everyone else is. But the following are actual products I found at Ocean State Job Lot in RI that you can buy a loved one this Christmas....
The perfect bedtime read-aloud series for the Parent who wants to "Scare the Shit Out of Your Kids":
Book 1: "Don't ask why Mommy is frantically flushing the toilet"
Books 2 & 3: "Oh, Look! It's A Kitty...Sweet Dreams!" & "No honey, I don't think the book will be staring at you while you sleep "
Book 4: An instant classic, as is the sequel "Rivers of Blood"
For that annoying Religious Zealot in your life (or elderly family member):
"BYO H2O" Bring Your Own Holy Water Bottle (be sure to pour some out for your homeys) & "Show Jesus the Money" Coin Purse...'cause he'll holla' for a dolla'!
For the person who just needs one reason to protest: